eBay item of the week

Title:
DKNY Men's Leather Pants I Unfortunately Own
Stylish. Expensive. Very much a bad purchase for me.

Description:
You are bidding on a mistake.

We all make mistakes. We date the wrong people for too long. We chew gum with our mouths open. We say inappropriate things in front of grandma.

And we buy leather pants.

I can explain these pants and why they are in my possession. I bought them many, many years ago under the spell of a woman whom I believed to have taste. She suggested I try them on. I did. She said they looked good. I wanted to have a relationship of sorts with her. I’m stupid and prone to impulsive decisions. I bought the pants.

The relationship, probably for better, never materialized. The girl, whose name I can’t even recall, is a distant memory. I think she was short.

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Note to self: Don't buy leather pants to get with girl. Don't buy leather pants. Ever.